Anecdotal Evidence

The Story of Glorified Vandalism

I love writing on things that weren’t meant to be written on — napkins, bridges, decrepit buildings, library books, wet concrete, drunk people’s faces. Some might call it vandalism…and yeah… that’s about right. But it’s also my desire to communicate without actually talking to people, because people are terrifying. I’d much rather leave a frosting…… Continue reading The Story of Glorified Vandalism

Anecdotal Evidence

Show The World Your Stones But Remember Your Bricks: Euphemism or Metaphor?

On my walk to work, I pass the old Allegheny County Courthouse and Jail, a big stone building with creepers growing up the northern wall. At about shoulder level, there is a rectangle cut in the stone with a patch of brick beneath. I’ve made it my superstition to touch the brick on my way to…… Continue reading Show The World Your Stones But Remember Your Bricks: Euphemism or Metaphor?

Anecdotal Evidence

An Ode To Teenage Wasteland

Do you have songs that make your ribs swing open on a hinge, and pump your heart full of helium? If one of those songs isn’t Teenage Wasteland (yes, nerds, I know it’s actually called Baba O’Riley), then you’re wrong. Now, like any other self-respecting millennial couch potato, the first time I heard TW was…… Continue reading An Ode To Teenage Wasteland

Anecdotal Evidence

Panic Attacks and Popcorn Kernels: The Story of Exploding

I know the signs of an oncoming panic attack. Heart races, hands shake, vision blurs, chest tightens, temperature fluctuates, and if it’s going to be a particularly bad attack, my arms go numb. If things get really bad, I turn into a giant blueberry. At least, that’s what it feels like.   Sometimes it’s best…… Continue reading Panic Attacks and Popcorn Kernels: The Story of Exploding

Anecdotal Evidence

Pillars of Delight: The Key to Great Content (but mostly rambling)

On Friday, I got certified in *Inbound Marketing. There was a portion on the test called “Pillars of Delight,” which sounds like a Hieronymus Bosch painting or some kind of designer drug, but it’s about creating content that people really want to read. The pillars are education, innovation, communication, and deep tissue massages. So, that’s what…… Continue reading Pillars of Delight: The Key to Great Content (but mostly rambling)

Anecdotal Evidence

Trump Presidency: The Story of Casual Cannibalism

I know this is a horrible way to start a post but…oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. The zombie apocalypse has arrived. The Trump presidency is young and already it has inspired some weird shit. I’m not talking about the misogyny (though slimy), alternative facts (though disturbing), or the simple fact that…… Continue reading Trump Presidency: The Story of Casual Cannibalism

Anecdotal Evidence

If I Wore a Mood Ring It Would Give Me The Finger

Let’s just get this out of the way. If a mood ring had fingers, would it wear a mood ring? From there it’s just inception. Like standing between two mirrors. Hey. I’m feeling moody. Maybe it’s a writer thing, but I’m all over the place. I just haven’t been able to write any good fiction…… Continue reading If I Wore a Mood Ring It Would Give Me The Finger

Musings

New Years Resoloos: The Story of Goals N’at

As always, my New Year’s resolution is, “Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” ….but don’t get arrested. Also, “Be fearless in pursuit of what sets your soul on fire.” …but don’t practice arson. I plan to check off the following as the year goes by: Get scuba certified at Uncle Joe’s Scuba.…… Continue reading New Years Resoloos: The Story of Goals N’at

Musings

The Struggle of Being Smaller Than Most People… and Several Dog Breeds

I sound like a whiner, but being a shortie with no upper body strength sometimes sucks. I’m not about to file for disability or write a memoir called, “My Life Being Mistaken For Your Baby Sister,” but I feel like ranting. That’s my prerogative and one of the reasons I have a blog. I’ll keep it…… Continue reading The Struggle of Being Smaller Than Most People… and Several Dog Breeds