Anecdotal Evidence

How To Resist Kicking Mean People In The Groin

It’s a fact of life: small people will try to make you feel stupid, and you’ll desperately want to kick them in the groin, but civilized society says you can’t. What to do? First, I recommend one thorough daydream about a swift kick. Then, instead of resorting to actual violence, check a few things off…… Continue reading How To Resist Kicking Mean People In The Groin

Anecdotal Evidence · Big Fat Wine Tears · Bigger Than My Body · Travel

An Ode To Teenage Wasteland

Do you have songs that make your ribs swing open on a hinge, and pump your heart full of helium? If one of those songs isn’t Teenage Wasteland (yes, nerds, I know it’s actually called Baba O’Riley), then you’re wrong. Now, like any other self-respecting millennial couch potato, the first time I heard TW was…… Continue reading An Ode To Teenage Wasteland

Anecdotal Evidence

Pillars of Delight: The Key to Great Content (but mostly rambling)

On Friday, I got certified in *Inbound Marketing. There was a portion on the test called “Pillars of Delight,” which sounds like a Hieronymus Bosch painting or some kind of designer drug, but it’s about creating content that people really want to read. The pillars are education, innovation, communication, and deep tissue massages. So, that’s what…… Continue reading Pillars of Delight: The Key to Great Content (but mostly rambling)

Anecdotal Evidence

Trump Presidency: The Story of Casual Cannibalism

I know this is a horrible way to start a post but…oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. The zombie apocalypse has arrived. The Trump presidency is young and already it has inspired some weird shit. I’m not talking about the misogyny (though slimy), alternative facts (though disturbing), or the simple fact that…… Continue reading Trump Presidency: The Story of Casual Cannibalism

Anecdotal Evidence

Self Portrait: Pictures of Me that Aren’t Me

It’s odd that a complete stranger can capture us in color, words, or music. But that’s art. Last Monday, I posted “self-portraits” in jest of the election. This Monday, I’m posting a more sincere picture book. I think everyone stumbles across photographs or art that makes some hidden part of them feel seen. These are…… Continue reading Self Portrait: Pictures of Me that Aren’t Me

Anecdotal Evidence · Bigger Than My Body

Battle of Two Gardens: The Story of Me and My Boyfriend

I flew to Florida to visit my boyfriend this weekend and acknowledged something I’ve probably known for a while. My boyfriend is a French garden and I am an English garden. Allow me to explain. French gardens are about harnessing nature and creating order and symmetry, like the gardens at the Palace of Versailles, which…… Continue reading Battle of Two Gardens: The Story of Me and My Boyfriend

Anecdotal Evidence · Bigger Than My Body

My Violent Muse: The Story of How Poetry Tries to Kill Me

  My muse is violent. Some writer’s muses seduce them, or hold their hand through the creative process. But my muse, let’s call her Wanda, is a real bastard. She plagues my brain and if I don’t do what she wants, she shits on my pillow. Wanda gives me headaches, stomach aches, pimples, and an…… Continue reading My Violent Muse: The Story of How Poetry Tries to Kill Me

Anecdotal Evidence · Bigger Than My Body · Drunk

Happiness is like Twerking: The Story of What To Do When You Feel Blue

Are you feeling blue? Well, call me Billy Mays (RIP) because I’m here to get rid of that stain. Watch how this post unleashes of the power of wine (and some other less important stuff), making tough stains (your blue-ness) disappear like magic. For me, happiness is a bit like twerking. Some people have mastered…… Continue reading Happiness is like Twerking: The Story of What To Do When You Feel Blue

Anecdotal Evidence · Big Fat Wine Tears · Bigger Than My Body · Drunk · Travel

Beautifully Average: The Story of How Everyone At Panera Bothered Me

I probably shouldn’t have a blog. I’m scatter-brained, mildly inappropriate, and most days I lead an exceptionally average life. But then I went to Panera and witnessed a murder. No, just kidding. But I did go to Panera and I almost committed a murder. So, I’m sitting by this loud couple who keeps talking, shouting…… Continue reading Beautifully Average: The Story of How Everyone At Panera Bothered Me