Correct me if I’m wrong, but this week was NY Fashion Week. What an exciting time! Celebrating new trends and bold designs and…other stuff. I don’t totally get it, but I really do have a serious respect for some of those designers. However, as a writer who works from home, I have my own version of fashion week.
There are pros and cons to working from home. A con is that when I’m on a conference call with my boss, my dad opens the front door and shouts to my mom, “Trace! Did you put this bag of poop here?” The bag of poop was from my sister’s dog, but out of context, it sounds like my dad (Bob) is asking Trace if she misplaced her poop bag. And really any talk of poop, human or otherwise, is probably inappropriate for work. (To be fair, this might be a con to still living with my parents as opposed to working from home. God love ’em.)
One of the pros is that I can work in my pajamas. Technically, I could dress like Marie Antoinette or Richard Simmons if I wanted to. I could literally wear a *George Bush mask and nothing else and no one would ever know. Having that option never gets old. So, in honor of fashion week, I’ll show you three of my carefully planned outfits. I didn’t do a whole week’s worth cause ain’t nobody got time for that. Plus, I’m an **outfit repeater. Sue me.
The First Look: “Mismatched Meow”
Notice the way nothing matches, including the socks. And that orange cat coffee purse (mug) is to die for. If you look closely, you’ll see a real live orange cat on the left side of the photo, underneath a chair, which adds a layer of irony to the look. The clothes don’t match but the cat and coffee purse do. Irony is very on-trend.
The Second Look: “Philosophical Owls”
This avant-garde look challenges seasonal expectations. Flannel jammies are meant for winter, but this designer doesn’t give AF and puts her writer in a bold owls-wearing-scarves print. The coffee purse sports a deep quote: “A room without books is like a body without a soul.”It’s this kind of fashion that leads us to ask the big questions like, “What if God was one of us? Just a slob like one of us?”
The Third Look: “Frumplestiltskins”
This look is for the writer who might need to leave the house to get the mail, or bring in the trash. A hooded-robe both keeps you warm and hides your identity from the neighbors. It even comes with matching slippers to protect your feet from rough pavement and bags of poop (not sure if everyone has this problem). The coffee purse is deceptively elegant, but advises you to “drop it like it’s hot”. The whole ensemble has a certain je ne sais quoi…frump factor?
I know what you’re thinking. ***Her life is just like Sex in the City!
I won’t correct you.
*I have never actually worn a George Bush mask and nothing else while I work. But an Obama mask… just kidding. It was Condoleezza Rice.
**What a traumatic moment for Lizzie when Kate called her an outfit repeater at graduation (I hate myself). But the lesson was that outfit repeaters sometimes go on to be mistaken for international pop stars. And that’s fun.
***I had a wonderful teacher in college who started out every new semester saying that if the reason you wanted to be a writer was to be like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City, you should just leave. The whole time I believed her, but look at my life!